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How The Grinch Stole Bowlsmas

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The Banner Society Advent Calendar’s entry for December 20.

The Grinch grabbed the rankings and started to shove

When he heard a small sound like the coo of a dove

He turned around fast, and he saw a small Who!

Little Cincy-Lou Who, who won seven games plus two.

The Grinch had been caught by this tiny Who daughter,

Whose playoff hopes just had been doused with cold water.

She stared at the Grinch and said, “Playoff Claus, why,”

”Why am I ranked barely better than nine?”

But, you know, that old Grinch was so smart and so slick,

He thought up a lie, and he thought it up quick!

”Why, my sweet little tot,” the fake Playoff Claus lied,

“The Gators did challenge the proud Crimson Tide”

”Oklahoma avenged one of their losses dear,”

”And wow, A&M throttled the great Volunteers!”

His fib fooled not the child. But he’d finished his speech,

So he scheduled her for a bowl game in the Peach.

And when Cincy Lou Who went to bed quite perplexed,

He whispered, “Hey Coastal Carolina, you’re next!”

Then the last thing he took

Was the log for their fire!

Then he went up the chimney, himself, the old liar.

On their walls he left nothing but hooks and some wire.

And he left a small note

That he wrote full of cheer

“With love from the Committee; let’s repeat this next year.”